Your complexion and your handwriting are replica, both JET BLACK

People think that I have always been the Manshi Pragya I am today... Bold, Brave and Confident. But it took me years to evolve, grow and build myself into what I am today.

Childhood gives you happy and beautiful memories, but mine was filled with self hatred and embarrassment due to the fact that I was born with a swarthy complexion.

I still remember my first day in school, the day when I was assigned to write a few lines on “myself” by our teacher. It was exciting and after completing my work I went straight to the teacher for corrections. After taking a look at my work, she glanced at me with disgust in her eyes and said in a loud voice, "Are you trying to match your handwriting with your face?". My innocent mind couldn't relate to that phrase immediately, but then she continued elaborating, she said, "Your complexion and your handwriting are replica, both jet black..."

These words pierced my heart, my eyes were filled with tears and my head lowered with humiliation. This incident had a great impact on my mind. Before this incident, for me, dark complexion was just a variation in God's palette that he used while painting us, as told by my mother but this innocent narrative had to collapse. Teachers who are generally our inspiration,  made me doubt myself, made me think otherwise. Things didn't stop there, similar incidents kept repeating itself, making me feel inferior, unloved and unwanted.

Being the youngest member of my joint family, I was pampered a lot and turned out to be the most notorious and playful kid. My siblings isolated me from their group due to the huge age gap between us. Even then, I made continuous efforts to grab their attention. This irritated them and they always wanted to get rid of me. One day they drew a girl on paper, painted her all black, more like scribbling, and they wrote my name there, calling me black and ugly. I ran to my mother crying and complained about my dark complexion..."Maa, nobody wants me because of my colour. All my cousins are so fair.. Why did God make me so dark? Doesn't he love me?"

My mother smiled at me and said "God loves us all but he loves you more and therefore he created you in his own image, his own favourite colour". She then showed me the portrait of Lord Krishna and all my doubts were answered.

After which, I started gaining my confidence and strength back. Now, I understand that complexion might be an important part of our personality, but it is not the only thing what matters. It's not our complexion, but our behaviour towards others, our hard work, talent and dedication that makes us achievers. And only our achievements can define us. Thereafter, I stopped getting bothered by others' comments on my complexion, it never mattered.

I realised that we cannot always change the way the world thinks, but we can always change ourselves, our thinking. We can choose to be happy, self confident and successful. We must learn to accept and love ourselves the way we are, only then can we change the world.

- Manshi Pragya