Scared of her own Reflection

Let me tell you a story about a girl, standing under the bright sunlight facing the sun, never afraid of shining bright on her face. As the morning assembly came to an end, the students lined up and went back to their classes. Among all the children, there was a little girl walking with her head down, was she ashamed of something? Was it something she did?

While going back to the class she had to face many mirrored windows reflecting every student’s face, girls in red and white uniforms, fixing their hair while passing through the windows but between all this was the reflection of that girl, ashamed of something. She always passed those windows with her head bowed down. Her reflection made her uncomfortable. She was afraid to see her own reflection, because it’s mere glance would knock down her confidence, the confidence which she gathered together every morning to face the world around. A mere glance at her reflection was enough to shatter a part of her within seconds and ruin her whole day. 

Generally mirrors are everyone’s love, then how can someone hate themselves this much? And the answer is body shaming. Our loved ones while reminding us of that extra pound we have gained might think they are favouring us, but in reality they are just making us think that there is a problem with us.

What is Body Shaming?

The action or practice of humiliating someone by making mocking or critical comments about their body shape or size.

How many times have you been told to change your appearance or felt like it? Body shaming and weight discrimination has always been a thing, but covid-19 pandemic has made it even worse. It has majorly  affected people's mental health. I find myself consuming a lot of media these days and I feel like I’m being bombarded with so many advertisements on ‘how to lose weight at home’, and workout programs. New transformation trends and showing belly button trends on Instagram, leads to women developing an unhealthy obsession with their bodies.

In fact, many series and movies use overweight character’s bodies as a basis for jokes. When you are body shamed and you start criticizing yourself before someone, others are also getting a chance to do the same and it lowers your confidence. It’s not only about being fat or thin, people are also criticized if they have a pimple on their face or a birthmark, or even if they are suffering from hair loss. You know what, people with freckles were also shamed, but now it’s a beauty statement, people are literally drawing freckles on their faces.

How body Shaming affects your mental health? It often leads to comparison and shame. The person automatically starts thinking no one would ever accept the way they are. As a preventive measure they detach themselves from people fearing anyone might hurt them. Especially in a public setting, it becomes a person’s greatest fear as it can bring out emotions like embarrassment, anxiety, low self-worth and so on. It affects both your mental and physical aspects. Impacts are also on people’s social and  professional life as well.

Social media definitely helps to spread body positivity all over the world, but it has also inundated us with images of perceived perfectionism when it comes to appearance. Further a public account gets flooded with positive as well as negative comments. This article is just not enough to describe the amount of torture a person has to go through because of getting body shamed. It’s crazy what someone’s perception can do to your mental health.

Now,  remember that scared little girl, she is 21 now. Still gathering confidence every morning to face the world, still scared of her own reflection, if you reply to her text late, she will overthink. If you stare at her for too long she will feel insecure, if you call her names just for fun she will laugh but feel ashamed of her body and face. She is still thankful for all she’s been through because it has taught her how to move on and say to herself every single day that it will pass. She is still learning how to love herself.

- Ishita Paul